Take some time

I know the holidays drain time and energy out of most households. I've heard it before, and I get it. In fact, after having my own household now for several years I see how the stress of the holidays can affect even the most demure individual.

As a teenager I began to hate the holidays because I felt like it had turned on my family. The television and the shopping centers declared Christmas the happiest time of the year. It was a time when all family and friends would come together in a big circle, hold hands, and sing carols. You would celebrate with everyone you ever saw, even strangers at the mall. Growing into a teenager I saw the ugly side of Christmas. Piles and piles of holiday cards sat in rows across the coffee table. Toppling over with negative energy, they were my mother's nemesis during the long month of December. The last minute shopping for all of those people that aren't family but still need some sort of gift of appreciation--the cards' partner in crime. Battling the traffic at the local shopping mall and the main drag of our town. The tension builds with each layer that I am adding to this complex network known as Christmas.

I had such a fond view of Christmas as a child. The BHG in me actually enjoyed homemade crafts that shined with holiday spirit and joyousness. Deep down, I'm not corny like that sentence, but I did enjoy the concept of people coming together, rejoicing in one another, and wishing each other peace and happiness. Who could disagree with that--beauty, love and friendship wrapped fully into one month of the year?

That being said, take a second and look past the rolls of wrapping paper, the cookie sheets, the buche de noel and the eggnog. One of my biggest pet peaves of the holidays have to do with what my mom hated most--holiday cards. Each year, she painstakingly wrote and signed at least a hundred cards. With each one, she struggled to determine how much she should write, what story she should tell. Half of the people she didn't even much like anymore honestly. It's harsh but true. And yet, she spent hours wishing them a joyous season and happiness over the coming year. When I began doing holiday cards 3 years ago, I kept the list short. I've added to it, deleted from it. I keep it short so that I can put a little bit of D and I into every card. I do care about the people I send them to, and I want them to know that. It didn't take me more than two hours one night in front of the TV to finish all of the cards, and I wrote a personal note in every one of them. Not that the prose I insert in every card is extremely poetic or inspiring, but it comes from my heart. With each card that I write, I think about the person and their family, and the relationship I'm thankful to have with them. I don't think you can do that when you use labels for my address, and a preprinted card that is void of any pen or personal marking. I love to see pictures of your children--and the entire family for that matter, which so often get left out of holiday cards--but I would love to see some reflection of effort.

I will continue to keep good spirit and cheer, despite those around me with the humbug mentality. I believe that Christmas can be more than a gift-giving festival, and a little more about quality time and love for one another.